Our family is finally getting back into our “normal” routine.

Brian went back to work this morning.  When he was home over lunch, he took a long nap and said that he was a little sore.  He seems to be doing OK, though.  He is actually glad to be doing something other than just sitting around the house.  😉

Christian seems to getting back into the swing of our mornings again.  Getting dressed (and on the bus) on Monday and Tuesday was not fun.  (Today was a million times better.  I kid you not!)  Christian wanted to sleep in and stay in his jammies.  He actually told me (& Brian) to “Get! Out!” (with finger raised and pointed) of his room.  We had to fight the urge to laugh ‘cuz Christian was SO serious.  🙂  Christian had also had a hard time falling asleep during the first half of this week.  I almost had him sleeping Monday night, when I heard Brian open and close our bedroom door and move down the hall.  Out of the silence, Christian proclaimed, “What’s that noise?!?” and then hopped out of bed to check.  Sigh.  His vocabulary has definitely blossomed over break (as other things have gone downhill).  His songs now included the Karaoke sequence at the end of the first Shrek movie — I have been serenaded while in the shower with “It’s fun to stay at the YMCA!”, “Do you really want to hurt me?”, “Staying Alive,” and “Dance to the Music.”  (Now, I need to learn the order of these songs so that I can sing them along correctly and not completely frustrate Christian.  Can I leave out Sir Mix-Alot, though???)

And Olivia, she is back to her Olivian ways.  😉

I love our routine…

Brian’s surgery went excellently.  His surgeon told me that it actually went better than he had hoped.  Praise the Lord!  He was also released from the Medical Center two hours earlier than we expected.  Hurray!  He is on some pretty heavy-duty meds, but doing well.  The soreness is starting to kick-in now, so I just keep bringing the meds, ice, and fluids on schedule hoping they will help.

Thank you for all your prayers!

By the way, the kids did great yesterday, too.  🙂

Tomorrow morning is Brian’s surgery.  Hernia surgery.  Outpatient surgery.  “No big deal.”  But, really, any time a loved one of mine goes completely under for any kind of surgery, I get a little nervous.

I was there for Christian’s tooth extraction surgery when they were broken off and infected.  (When he came to, he wrestle three nurses to get the IV out of his arm, and he was only 2!  They asked me to come back and hold it in for them.  He is a surprisingly strong little man!!!) 

I was there when Olivia was put under when she had her renal reflux problem taken care of.  She was only 18 months old, but pulled through with flying colors. 🙂

Now, it’s my turn to wait for Brian.  My husband.  My love.  My partner.  As he goes under.  I have to say that my anxiety has gotten the best of me.  I’m pretty nervous.  I have already had a nightmare about it.  But I try to keep reminding myself that I am not in control of these things.  God is.

I will pray that He guides the hands of the surgeons as they repair his hernia.  I will pray that He guides the anesthesiologist as he provides the medication needed.  I will pray that He brings my husband through this surgery safely.  I will also pray that His will is done, whatever that may be.

If you are so inclined, please say a prayer for my husband and all involved in his surgery tomorrow morning.  I will be so very grateful!  Oh, please also pray for the grandparents/therapists who will be watching/working with the kids tomorrow, as we will be gone before they get up, making their “routine” very unusual for the day.

Last night, I woke at 3:30am and could NOT get back to sleep.  The more I tried to sleep, the more I couldn’t, so I decided to just get up, catch up on the news, read the ads, and chill on the couch.  I was hoping to be lulled back to sleep by the quiet of the house and the boredom of the news repeating every 1/2-hour.  It didn’t work.

I think that Christian’s anxiety over the coming break from routine is making me anxious — making me wonder if we will battle more and/or different issues than what we had last Christmas break.  We have a HUGE snowstorm predicted to slam into the state on Christmas Eve into Day which makes me wonder how our sleep will be affected because of the drastic change in weather.  Brian has a minor surgery, yet still surgery, coming up and I wonder how much pain he will be in afterwards and how much help he will need and how I will be able to balance his needs with the needs of both of the kids (as Christian’s break will still be going on)…

(The one part of his surgery day that I am really looking forward to is the 4-7 hours that I will have to spend at the hospital where I am in charge of absolutely no one else!  I will not be interrupted by a hundred questions a minute every minute for an hour.  I will not have to wipe anyone’s behind or nose (unless it’s my own).  I will not have to listen to the endless tantrum of a toddler bent on wearing a bathing suit (only) out in the snow.  …  Those hours will be a tiny sliver of the respite that I SO DESPARATELY need!!!  I am SO looking forward to that!  🙂 )

Anyway, I guess my mind is just racing.  Filled with SO much uncertainly at the moment.  Having a hard time focusing on the celebration of Christmas that is at hand.  I’m exhausted.  On the verge of tears.  Spent.  Having a hard time holding myself together.

Thankful, so very thankful, that I’m not the one in control of this crazy thing call life. 

Dear Lord, help me cast all of my anxieties on you…

Brian and I received an extraordinarily super generous gift on Tuesday.  Money towards purchasing a snow thrower!  An answer to prayers!!!  A relief to me…

…I have been trying to shovel our driveway when I can.  I can’t shovel when I’m in charge of watching both kids as I cannot bring Christian out without having to chase him around.  Olivia gets a little bored after a 1/2-hour when no one is directly playing with her.  I’m not comfortable leaving them in the house unsupervised.  (I can hardly take a shower without coming out to find some sort of serious disagreement/pushing-shoving match.)  It’s been taking me well over an hour to shovel, closer to 1-1/2 hours, leaving me exhausted and hardly able to move for a couple of hours.  (I have the start of a slipped disk in my back and have had some carpal tunnel issues since both of my pregnancies.)  Still, it has to be done so that the bus and therapists can get in and out of our driveway.

The real kicker is that Brian is going in for hernia surgery at the end of the month.  That leaves me in charge of everything (and Christian is off of school yet, too).  I don’t mind being in charge of everything, but it scared me to have that responsibility and the snow removal, too. 

This gift of a snow thrower is just so awesome!  Really beyond words for me as “Thank You” seems so inadequate.  Brian and I went and picked one out last night and brought it home.  I’m ecstatic!  I have something new to learn now, too, as I have never operated a snow thrower before.  😉  I know I will still have to find the time to be able to move the snow, but hopefully it will make it much faster and allow me to come back into the house without all of the body pain.  🙂

Thank you for the gift!  Brian and I appreciate it SO incredibly much!!!